Why New Year’s Goals Fail (And What to Do Instead)

Audrey Sutton Mills

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Audrey

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Quiet the Itty Bitty Shitty Committee

It happens every year. January rolls in, and we all start dreaming big—losing weight, making more money, getting organized. Sound familiar?

But here’s the kicker: studies show that only 9% of people actually keep their New Year’s resolutions. Nine percent! That means the vast majority of us start strong and then lose steam by February. Why does this happen?

Because we’re going about it the wrong way.

Most goals are driven by the mind—by what society tells us we should do, achieve, or look like. It’s no wonder these resolutions fall flat. They don’t connect to who we truly are or what we deeply desire. They come from pressure, not presence.

I know this because I’ve been there.

When My Goals Felt Hollow

There was a year I set the goal to run every morning. I pictured myself as this fit, unstoppable version of me, gliding through the streets at sunrise. But by the third week, I hit snooze more often than not.

Why? Because it wasn’t coming from my heart. Deep down, my body was craving rest, not relentless running. My goal wasn’t aligned with what I truly needed—it was all about chasing an image of who I thought I should be.

Sound familiar?

Setting Intentions That Stick

That experience taught me something profound: real, lasting change doesn’t come from the outside. It comes from the inside. When we pause, get quiet, and listen to the whisper of our heart and soul, that’s where the magic begins.

Intentions are different from goals. Goals are about doing. Intentions are about being.

When we set intentions, we ask:

• Who do I want to become?

• How do I want to feel?

• What values do I want to honor?

It’s a shift from striving to aligning, from forcing to flowing. And when we set intentions from this heart-centered place, they have a way of unfolding naturally—without all the guilt and grind.

Why Most Goals Fail

If you’ve ever struggled to stick to a goal, you’re not alone. Here’s why most goals fail:

1. They’re rooted in external pressure. We focus on what looks good on paper, not what feels true to us.

2. They lack emotional connection. If a goal doesn’t light you up, it’s easy to abandon it.

3. We try to do too much at once. Big changes don’t happen overnight—they happen with small, meaningful steps.

How to Set Heart-Centered Intentions

If you’re ready to ditch the old way of goal-setting and try something new, here’s how to start:

1. Pause and Get Quiet

Before you set any intentions, create space to listen. What is your heart whispering to you? This might mean meditating, journaling, or simply sitting in silence.

2. Tune Into Your Why

Ask yourself: Why does this matter to me? If your “why” feels aligned with your values, you’re on the right track.

3. Set Intentions Around Feelings, Not Outcomes

Instead of saying, “I want to lose 10 pounds,” try, “I want to feel strong and energized.”

4. Create a Ritual to Anchor Your Intentions

There’s something powerful about setting intentions with purpose. That’s why I created a New Moon Ritual—a self-led course with yoga, guided meditation, and a journal workbook to help you connect with your heart and soul. It’s the perfect way to set intentions at the start of the year, a new moon, or any new season.

For just $22, this ritual is a beautiful way to pause, reflect, and plant seeds for what you truly desire.

A Final Thought

Here’s what I’ve learned: life isn’t about checking boxes or proving your worth. It’s about aligning with your truth, honoring your heart, and letting that guide your path.

So, this year, instead of setting another resolution, I invite you to pause. Get quiet. Listen to what your soul is asking for. Then set an intention—not for who you think you should be, but for who you truly are.

Ready to take the first step? Join me for the New Moon Ritual and discover the power of tuning into your heart.

With love,

Audrey

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