I apologize for not posting an episode last Wednesday on the SOUL SCHOOL with AUDREY PODCAST. This past week has been the hardest of my life. One week ago, my dad, who is my lifeline, biggest supporter and best friend passed away. We had a really special father/daughter bond. He listened to me (unconditionally and patiently…and often for hours), was my biggest fan and a big supporter of female empowerment. He always encouraged me to believe in myself, especially when I couldn’t do it for myself. He was so excited to be a grandfather. When we found out we were having a girl, he said “Girls are the best! If you only get to have one, then definitely have a girl.” He was devoted to my mom and I. He was intelligent, witty, carefree, honorable, loving and self-less. He departed this earth too early.
To say my heart in broken is an understatement. But my dad was such an optimist and always said “Have No Regrets. Go live your life to the fullest.”
So, in his words, he would say “Never let a crisis go to waste.” I am giving myself time to cry, journal, receive, accept and express my sorrow. I am also looking for the lessons I can receive from him, as he was always a teacher.
Today’s Mantra is: Act as if today were your last day on earth.
It’s one of those sayings that is easy to say, and sounds really good, but really hard to do. We are human. We are busy. We forget.
We go to bed angry. We say hurtful things that sting and leave a lasting mark, especially to the ones closest to us. We withhold our love. We hold on to grudges. We don’t express our gratitude freely and often. We don’t appreciate every single thing and person.
Because we are human, we also need to give ourselves grace.
When you lose someone close to you, it’s normal to have regrets. There are things I wish I had said to my dad before he departed this world. I wish I wasn’t so stingy with my “I love you’s” or my hugs. I wish I didn’t have attitude or was snippy and sassy to him the weekend before he died. Even though we talked twice a day and saw each other a couple of times a week, I wish I had spent more quality time with him. I wish I had listened to him and let him talk more instead of being selfish. I wish I had expressed my gratitude for him being the best dad, role model and friend. I guess in the end, I just wish for more…
Never let a crisis go to waste. What can we learn?
Who would you make amends with? What grudges and judgements are you holding onto that don’t really matter? Who does matter to you? What do you want to say now to someone to express your love and appreciation? How can you be more fully present to what is important to you?
Don’t waste today. Don’t hoard your love. Express freely and kindly your gratitude and love for others and yourself.
Act as if today were your last.
This is all so new and surreal. I’m going to send out some more lessons I learned as I work through this healing journey. If you’d like to stay in touch and receive this blog, please SIGN UP for my newsletter.
Thank you for listening. I hope I am helping you as much as you are helping me. I am truly grateful to you for being part of this amazing soulful community.
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